Vitaly Zdorovetskiy of Vitalyzdtv Youtube Gets Monkey High
I really can’t deal with these YouTube prank channels. In general, the pranks aren’t that funny, it’s just “Hey, I’m out here being a dickhead, won’t it be funny when people get mad the way you would logically expect them to?” For some reason, though, people seem to like them, which is why when one of them finally does something stupid enough to bring them to my attention they have like, 10 million subscribers.
That brings us to VitalyzdTv, a YouTube channel that has nearly 10 million subscribers and just did something dumb enough to bring them to my attention. Here’s a sample of the sort of thing they normally do as “pranks”.
That one manages to be vaguely racist at points, in addition to being 5 minutes of “Get it, there’s a soda named Squirt!”
But what did they do that people are talking about them? Well, they posted a video to Instagram of them allegedly getting a monkey high.
And oh my god did social media freak about how it’s cruel to get a monkey high. PETA even took a break from trying to horrifically scar children trying to have Thanksgiving dinner to investigate if it’s cruel.
Thanks for reporting this! We’ve passed it onto our Cruelty Investigations Department. If you ever need to report cruelty to animals, please do so here: https://t.co/mY8dYMp8wH. ❤
— peta2 (@peta2) June 9, 2018
I will do everything in my power to get your twitter page banned and charged with cruelty to animals
— Shaun (@Shaun78088051) June 10, 2018
You fight the good fight, guy with 10 followers, you’re making a difference.
There’s good news, though, because we’ve known for years that monkeys like getting high.
The report illustrates how the FDA leaned on a controversial study, paid for by the U.S. National Institute on Drug Abuse, to draw some of its conclusion. The study from 2003 concluded that since squirrel monkeys really seem to enjoy the stoned effects of tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), cannabis should be considered a real threat to the grand scheme of drug addiction in the United States. The FDA said these types of studies are “often useful in predicting rewarding effects in humans, and is indicative of abuse liability.”
See it’s not cruel, it’s just like giving your cat some of those treats they like and look up at you with their cute little kitten eyes until you give them some. Except it’s weed. Don’t give weed to your cat or dog, but do give it to your monkey.
More good news is that smoking weed with monkeys is a really good way to get a lethal form of herpes, so hopefully these dumb fuckers won’t be around to do their idiotic pranks much longer. Herpes B can cause “severe neurological impairment,” so these dudes might actually have it already. Imagine the headline: Youtube Dumbasses Get Herpes From Monkey and Die. Finally, a story with a happy ending.